How Autistic Adults Cope: What Research Suggests

Written By Drew Dixon Karris

Coping with daily stress is hard for a lot of people—but for autistic adults, it can look different than what some mental health advice suggests. Many coping tips are based on what works for non-autistic people. Strategies like abstract journaling, mindfulness meditations, seeking distraction through novel activities, or “talking it out,” might not feel helpful. Sometimes, they can even make things more confusing.

The good news is: there’s research that suggests autistic people tend to cope in unique ways. There’s no one right way to be “resilient.” 

Here’s what recent studies found about how autistic adults cope and what helps us feel stronger over time.

Coping and Resilience Aren’t the Same

One study looked at how autistic adults deal with stress. It found that people who used a large quantity of coping strategies didn’t always feel more resilient (Muniandy et al., 2022). In fact, some felt more burned out. Meanwhile, others who used fewer strategies—but ones that actually worked for them—felt better overall.

The takeaway:  It’s not about how much effort you’re putting in. It’s about whether it’s helping.

 Common Ways Autistic Adults Cope

In another study, autistic adults talked about what they do to manage life stress (Dachez & Ndobo, 2018). Here are the main themes: 

  • Special interests – They help with focus, emotional regulation, and a sense of identity.

  • Getting a diagnosis – Having an explanation helped some people understand themselves and feel less alone.

  • Advocacy – Some people found that being open about autism helped them feel stronger and more connected.

  • Spending time with animals or other neurodivergent people – These relationships often feel safer and more supportive for some neurodivergent people.

  • Learning how people work – Some adults said they study social patterns or psychology to make things make more sense.

  • Humor – Sometimes reframing a difficult experience with humor made it feel more manageable.

  • Trying to pass as non-autistic – Many people used this to avoid judgment, but said it was draining long-term.

Some of these help in the short term. Some are more sustainable. Some are both. What matters is whether they work for you. 

What Helps People Feel More Resilient?

A 2023 study worked with autistic adults, parents, and providers about what actually helps autistic people bounce back from hard things—or just get through the day (Ghanouni & Quirke, 2023). Three main themes arose:

  1. Letting go of unrealistic expectations
     Trying to live like a neurotypical person made things harder. Feeling free to do things differently helped reduce stress.

  2. Having structure and routine
     Predictable routines made life feel more manageable and less overwhelming.

  3. Learning over time
     Many people said they learned what worked for them through trial and error—not by following one set formula.

 Ideas to Try

If you’re figuring this out for yourself, here are a few ideas that may help:

  • Make space for your interests. These are more than hobbies—they can support emotional regulation, identity, and a sense of meaning.

  • Pay attention to what helps you feel grounded. This might include consistent routines, sensory-friendly environments, or relationships that feel safe and low-pressure.

  • Seek out connection in ways that feel right for you. This could be through friendships, community spaces, animals, nature, neurodivergent-led groups, or books and writing that reflect your experience.

  • Define success on your own terms. It doesn’t have to mean constant productivity, independence, or fitting others’ expectations. It might mean feeling calm, safe, and aligned with your needs and values.

References

Dachez, J., & Ndobo, A. (2018). Coping strategies of adults with high-functioning autism: A qualitative analysis. Journal of Adult Development, 25(2), 86–95. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10804-017-9278-5

Ghanouni, P., & Quirke, S. (2023). Resilience and coping strategies in adults with autism spectrum disorder. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 53, 456–467. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-022-05436-y

Muniandy, K., Fisher, M. H., & Stagg, S. D. (2022). Coping‐resilience profiles and experiences of stress in autistic adults. Autism Research, 15(7), 1285–1298. https://doi.org/10.1002/aur.2706

A Note from Me

I’m a clinical psychology postdoctoral fellow. I work with autistic people, disordered eating, and gender identity. I conduct comprehensive psychological evaluations to help people understand themselves more clearly, psychotherapy for ongoing support, and group therapy for autistic young people looking for community and skill-building.

Many neurodivergent people feel overwhelmed and are trying to figure out what works for them. Sometimes, therapy and/or assessment can help. These strategies are not about changing who you are. They can help you feel more like yourself. 

Reach out if you'd like support or have questions.

Drew Dixon Karris, Psy.D.

Drew Dixon Karris